Personal Vows - Writing Tips

Take a look below for some inspiration.

This is a basic step-by-step outline to help you construct some truly wonderful and sentimental vows for one another.

1. Start by saying in your own words how much you love your partner.

2. Communicate how you plan to support and understand your partner through life’s journey.

3. Share something personal about your love, maybe it is something quirky/raw/real... as long as it is something you know the other person would be okay sharing amongst their closest family and friends.

4. Make serious promises you intend to commit to. You can do this in a formal manner, like “I promise to always have your back and support you in your decisions”, or in a cute way...like “I can’t promise I won’t steal the comforter at night, but I CAN promise that I will always be your source of comfort during tough times”. You can make as few or as many promises as you like...do what feels right to you.

5. Sometimes couples like to acknowledge the role their family will play in their commitment, by noting the help and support they will give you when times get tough.

Extra Tips

1. Don't wait until the last minute to write your vows. Start thinking about them now. Write down ideas as they come to you (make notes in your phone when your partner does something that reminds you why you love them so).

2. Write a couple of drafts and consider having someone proofread them. Maybe you might like to practice reading in front of someone you trust.

3. Don't make them too long. It's understandable that you want to fit everything you're feeling into your vows—but you may get too nervous to read something so long, and I already cover a lot of your story and feelings for one another in your script.

4. Avoid words like "always" and "never." This kind of absolute language is all but impossible to live up to. It's not always going to be easy, so don't promise perfection.

5. Embrace sentimentality. This isn't the time to worry about being corny or cheesy. If the words are heartfelt, then they're not cheesy.

6. If you can make your partner laugh or smile, because of an inside joke or quirky recollection of a great time had together - that’s a bonus...but don’t go after laughs for the sake of it.

7. Get inspired by books, songs, movies, and poems. If you have a favourite line from a movie or song that expresses your feelings, use it as a starting point. Maybe there is a line from a movie or book or song that is very special to you both?

8. Practice reading out loud. Reading your vows out loud will help you catch spots where the grammar might be iffy or where you’re missing a word, as well as figure out if the structure is cohesive.

9. Indicate pauses and intonation. You’ll want to allow time to laugh or tear up without interrupting your flow. For the best comprehension and emotional reactions, take it slow and focus on breaks, pauses, and intonation.

10. Keep the vows a secret from your partner until the ceremony. Your vows are a gift to one another, so don't share them ahead of time. It will make the ceremony all the more impactful and emotional if you're hearing them for the first time. Of course, you will need to share them with me (emailed separately) so that I may include them in my professionally presented vow books - for you to read from.